Receiving criticism within the office, whether or not on written studies and initiatives, displays or efficiency critiques, could make us doubt ourselves. It will probably really feel unattainable to not take criticism personally as a result of many people are likely to get our self-worth from our careers.
As an instructional, I cope with criticism on a regular basis, from suggestions on my analysis to evaluations of my instructing. Generally, I really feel just like the criticism is directed at me personally, and never on the content material of what I’ve written or the standard of my lectures.
In these moments, I attempt to disentangle my sense of self-worth from what I do and the way others understand me. The work of Hannah Arendt is especially useful right here. In her ebook, The Human Situation (1958), the German-Jewish political thinker makes a distinction between “who” we’re and “what” we’re. She writes:
In performing and talking, males present who they’re, reveal actively their distinctive private identities and thus make their look within the human world … This disclosure of ‘who’ in contradistinction to ‘what’ any person is – his qualities, items, abilities, and shortcomings, which he could show or disguise – is implicit in all the pieces any person says and does.
For Arendt, who we’re is synonymous with our distinctive personalities. However describing somebody’s persona is unattainable. Phrases can not adequately seize what makes somebody who they’re. After we strive, Arendt argues, phrases fail us, and we find yourself describing what somebody is: their abilities, character traits and flaws.
Our attributes (what we’re) don’t make us distinctive. What distinguishes a instructor, who has pink hair and inexperienced eyes, who treats their college students with kindness, and who will get together with their colleagues simply, from one other instructor with the identical options?
Disclosing who we’re
Arendt writes that individuals disclose who they’re after they communicate and work together with others, concluding that this may solely happen in public. What she means is that somebody’s persona shines by way of their phrases and actions. For instance, what makes a instructor distinctive is how they present kindness and understanding to their college students in their very own method – which nobody else can replicate.
Learn extra:
Philosophy might help us cope with failures that appear insurmountable
If our personalities solely shine by way of in public, then it might lead us to imagine that our sense of self-worth is basically within the palms of others. Who we’re appears inextricably linked to how others understand us and their analysis of what we do. The instructor’s uniqueness seems to be solely depending on how their college students understand their interactions.
Nonetheless, Arendt’s reflections on the general public nature of our personalities can really assist us keep away from taking criticism personally. Regardless that who we’re is perceived by others, we aren’t absolutely decided by their opinions of us. It’s because descriptions and evaluations of what we do can by no means seize who we’re.
Most of the time, criticism merely provides an evaluation of what we’re. Arendt’s distinction between who and what we’re reminds us to uncouple our sense of self-worth from the opinions of others. It will probably assist us realise that we’re infinitely greater than another person’s evaluation of our work.
In case your boss tells you that your writing may very well be clearer, that you must come extra ready for the following assembly or that it is advisable be a greater crew participant, they aren’t saying something about who you’re as an individual.
Arthur Bargan/Shutterstock
When Arendt claims that our personalities are within the palms of others, she implies that we can not management what others consider us. We are able to strive our greatest to indicate that we’re variety, easygoing and good at what we do. We are able to even attempt to seem in a sure method or to influence others to alter their opinions of us. However we merely can not drive others to understand us how we wish them to.
So, if revealing who we’re is outdoors of our management, then why even attempt to show ourselves to others? Why take somebody’s criticism to coronary heart once we can’t essentially change their opinion of us?
Arendt is satisfied that revealing our distinctive personalities continues to be worthwhile. She maintains: “though no person is aware of whom he reveals when he discloses himself in deed and phrase, he have to be keen to threat the disclosure.”
There isn’t a assure that others will see us how we see ourselves, or that we are able to keep away from criticism solely. However with out taking the chance of showing our distinctive personalities, we forfeit the chance to indicate others who we’re and what we’re able to.
